Category Archives: Real Life

Hi!

Hi, so we haven’t been around and that makes us sad.

Truth is a truck load of really bad things have been going on in my life and we just haven’t had time to think about this. I’ve been streaming a bunch on my Twitch stream as a way to block it all out and not feel bad playing video games but to be honest….

Life just sucks.

As you might know I caught COVID in March and have had to take time off work nearly every month since. Every month I’ve had to borrow money to make it to the end of the next, each month getting closer to not being able to pay essential bills and needing to borrow more.

This month I finally reached that point.

Not only that but I now don’t have my family to turn to and also have three months to find somewhere else to live, which is just a tad difficult when this month I still have £100 of bills to pay with £7 in my bank.

That is why I’m begging anyone who comes across this and ever enjoyed a single thing I did to give as little as you can to help me slowly raise the money to be able to survive what has turned out to be one of the worst months of my life.

This money isn’t going towards anything but my bills.

For the rest of March I will be streaming daily for at least a hour every day. One single donation of ANY size will let you pick a game for a stream (as long as I obviously own it) but I will also let people name characters, places etc, pick memes to be shown on our pre-show and even maybe other things if I can think of them.

I will only be sharing this or talking about it in August tho I might keep the Ko-fi page up after and I hate begging but I just can’t afford to live anymore.

So if anything I’ve ever done has made you smile and you have spare mons to give anything is appreciated.

https://ko-fi.com/awerka89

https://www.twitch.tv/awerka89

https://streamlabs.com/awerka89/tip

I’m back!

Hey guys!

You know what I’ve always said, if I can have something go wrong at the worst time I’ll have something go wrong at the worst time and that is what happened to me on April 1st.

There I was overnight, minding my own business and downloading the new Mount & Blade game when suddenly everything went wrong. In the end at 2am something had managed to corrupt my D drive (which was the major drive for my laptop) and as I was fixing it the entire OS just got deleted. I was crying let me tell you that and in the end had to splash out for a new PC.

Yes you heard it right I’ve actually gone and got myself a desktop instead of replacing it with a laptop.

I did ask the others to write something so you all knew what was happening but none of them wanted to… Thanks guys…

As of a hour ago my new PC arrived, I’ve got it all set up and I’m even going to stream for a little bit to see how this thing holds up.

Reviews, randomness and everything else will resume over the weekend as we have to get a lot of things done and ready for the new season of anime. I also haven’t been sat twiddling my thumbs, with no access to a computer I found myself more motivated to do things so every movie I’ve watched I’ve reviewed in my notebook to be transferred onto the site ASAP.

Hope you have all been well!

If any of you are free then feel free to pop along in about 10 minutes to https://www.twitch.tv/awerka89 we will be playing Marbles which is a interactive Twitch game we can all play along with. We are currently extremely close to our goal of 50 followers (we’re on 33) so come give us a follow!

Diary #37 : Sickness and Sleep

There is a very good reason I’m writing this nonsense right now.

One thing I hate is napping, I have extreme time anxiety and get very anxious and depressed when I waste time during the day napping. The same happens if I wake up late. Therefore being sick is the worst thing in the world for me as all I want to do is nap and nap is all I’ve been doing.

Continue reading Diary #37 : Sickness and Sleep

Weekend Update!

I do intend to write something every few days during the Lockdown and here we are!

There isn’t much new to report here, I’m back to work on Monday and even have a special letter saying that I’m a essential worker which is a weird thing seeing that most people think that retail workers are below them. My throat is still shot, my nerve damage is playing up and my depression and anxiety are not doing well.

BUT!

Thanks to my favourite streamers and their communities I’m doing OK. Most of them have been streaming every day, there has been a lot of chilling with Animal Crossing and Disney+ has given me every series of Simpsons to binge.

Whilst my doctor and therapist don’t want me to go back to work and I’ve just given up on trying to sort out everything that they and my managers want me to sort out I’m looking forward to working because I realised that in two weeks I’ve barely been outside, barely seen anyone and maybe need to actually maybe go back for my own mental health reasons.

My favorite streamer streams from 8pm-5am UK time seeing he’s West Coast USA so I need to stop staying up watching him and get back to actually living in UK time as much as it’ll hurt not being active in that community though at the same time it’ll be good to be social IRL instead of just over the computer.

So how about you guys?

Who is making sure to go out for their hour exercise? Have you started doing something you’ve put off because of working usually? Are you working from home and life is basically the same as always just the scenery has changed? Anyone binge anything interesting?

Are you doing one thing a day to make you happy? If you are coped up with other people are you making sure to have a little bit of time to yourself every day?

Keep your spirits up and I hope you all are well!

Diary #36 : COVID-19 and update

So I really have to apologise but we have got super behind on everything right at the end of the season at that.

Thing is I’ve been super sick basically since the impact of COVID-19 (Coronavirus) hit the UK a week and a bit ago. At one point I was very worried I had caught it but it became obvious I probably just had a sore throat that because I have a bad immune system and get sicker then most when I get sick, and find I catch everything going, just managed to absolutely destroy me in the last week and a bit.

That isn’t a excuse to why things got behind, they were getting that way before I even got sick. That is down to depression and the fact that panic buying had already started up and the stress of work was weighing heavy on me.

I still have a few days of self isolation left and I’m being told that for mental health reasons I might want to take a few more days off but that is personal stuff I don’t need to go into, the reason I bring it up is because I need to try and focus now on regaining some of the momentum I brought into this year.

So the update part of this is basically to let you all know that I will be slowly, hopefully getting back up to date. The stupid thing is I have drafts of so many shows DONE ready to be posted but it is finding that little bit of strength to log in and do stuff as my anxiety and depression leave me basically a potato incapable of doing much.

Below is the COVID-19 stuff…

Continue reading Diary #36 : COVID-19 and update

Diary #35 : Another update + A proper end to the Anxiety Experiment

So I’ve been a bit of a bad but I’m trying to sort that out.

You might think I’ve put streaming before the website but that isn’t really true. I mean yeah I have been streaming a whole bunch when I might of wanted to be writing but there is a reason.

I’m going to go into that in a minute but because it is now a big part of my week and we are now kind of pretend trying to get to 50 followers just to see if we can I’ll put the link not only to our Twitch page but now our brand spanking new Discord server right here.

Twitch : https://www.twitch.tv/awerka89

Discord : https://discord.gg/yTTvzw

The update part of this is that I have notes, first drafts and all sorts of EVERYTHING (nearly) that needs to be updated. I just need to sit down and write it all out. Pet has been delayed because I didn’t realise that I had totally forgotten to get the week before lasts review out, I don’t think it was even written. Everything else will be out ASAP.

Doctor Who and Inside No. 9 I’m only just getting up to date with so I’ve been avoiding Amanda’s reviews to avoid spoilers (I know a bad way of doing things but I’ve been super excited about both shows but had no time to watch them) they will 100% be out TODAY.

This weeks stuff I will hopefully get working on tomorrow and the weekend.

I will try and balance streaming and writing much better going forward, with new hours at work which will hopefully make me a little more motivated that shouldn’t be too hard, I’ll have a proper schedule a week in advance for streaming too which I’ll post in Discord. If not this month next month I’m hoping to have emotes on Discord too.

Below is a reason why I’ve been streaming more but please feel free to follow us and join us on the Discord. It isn’t just about streaming and gaming we have channels for all sorts so we’d like you to join in and hang out with us.

Continue reading Diary #35 : Another update + A proper end to the Anxiety Experiment

Diary #34 : Pain. The Real Enemy.

So you might have noticed we did really well for a couple weeks and then last week everything just went to pot.

As always there is a reason and hopefully as this week rolls on it’ll stop being a reason that everything is held up and just disappear from my life for good. That reason is pain and I’ll explain a little about it below.

Continue reading Diary #34 : Pain. The Real Enemy.

The Anxiety Experiment #3 : Bear With Me Episode 2 Part 2

We still haven’t finished Episode 2 mainly down to time constraints, some down to me not finding a item I needed and a lot down to my internet/Streamlabs/Whatever playing up…

 

It is starting to get disheartening though.

Continue reading The Anxiety Experiment #3 : Bear With Me Episode 2 Part 2