“Atashitte, Honto Baka” (あたしって、ほんとバカ)
Sayaka is on a downward path that might not end in a good place for her and Madoka is being stressed to the point she might just become a Magical Girl.
It isn’t going well for Homura.
The entire episode is just awfully sad and really hurts to be honest to watch.
I said from the beginning that Sayaka making her wish based on romantic feelings to help someone else was always going to be a bad thing, after all just because she helped him by giving up her soul for him, something he doesn’t know happened anyway, doesn’t make him and his life indebted to her.
To be honest I think she was having a bit of a break down knowing that her soul and body are now disconnected and it just happened at the wrong time that she had this ultimatum from Hitomi. It came out of the blue and hit her when she was stressing about something terrifying. If that hadn’t happened and she was able to have time to come to terms with the fact that she’s now really just a blue thing in a bottle I think it would have turned out differently but because she didn’t have time to relax and think about it and come to terms with who she is now we have what happened in this episode.
Poor Sayaka has pretty much become a witch.
THAT is what Kyubey actually is.
I mean it all comes out in this episode, who Homura is and kind of just what Kyubey is up to. Homura is a time traveler which now makes sense of why she’s so against Madoka, the person Kyubey openly brags could be the most powerful witch of all time, becoming a Magical Girl and names Kyubey a Incubator which seconds later becomes a entire speech on how “Girl” is just a word for a “Woman” (no I don’t know why I’m putting it in quotation marks but meh) that hasn’t matured so “Magical Girl” is just the world for a “Witch” that hasn’t bloomed yet.
Grief seed… It all makes sense.
With the amount of pain and suffering Sayaka’s wish and transformation has left on her of course she’d become a Witch.
Homura is annoying though. I mean that might be the wrong word for it but her entire BEING is what has caused all this so far.
Instead of being NICE in the beginning she was a dick. This lead to them not trusting her at all which also lead to Mami dying. After Mami died OF COURSE the stronger headed of the two, Sayaka, wouldn’t trust the ONE PERSON who was being a dick to the ONE NICE person they’d met in this crazy world. Her being a enigma makes sense to a point but because she’s just been a grouchy dark cloud over the entire world so far she’s pushed the girls to the point that they won’t listen to her, won’t do as she says and even if she now told them the truth maybe only Kyoko would listen to her and even then as SHE attacked Sayaka in the first place she’s hardly going to be someone that they all rush to listen to.
Now let me explain that I UNDERSTAND Homura.
For a start obviously whatever happened in her time line has absolutely crushed her. Sayaka as she falls into despair in this episode even describes how it looks like Homura has already gotten to this point herself. She doesn’t care, she’s angry and empty. So for a start her job is to stop Madoka being a magical girl but she obviously see’s it as a job and one that I’m not sure she really thinks she can stop. How many times she’s traveled back in time or whatever I don’t know, it makes it sound like only once but if it turns out to be more then once then of course she might have tried the obvious things first and it didn’t work but it is one of those things that when a task seems impossible you bury your head and make it worse.
She’s making it worse.
I also very much understand that suddenly turning around and being all “I’m a time traveler and you can’t be a Magical Girl because of these reasons and Kyubey is evil” might not be the best way to go about it. I watch Doctor Who, I have seen Lister trying to explain to camera’s about time travel and shit like that on Red Dwarf. I. Get. It.
At the same time because we’ve only seen this Homura, at this point in her life and we’ve only seen her trying in this time line to help and we’ve only seen Madoka being absolutely lovely and understanding it is hard to imagine a universe where befriending Madoka and Mami and trying to explain what is happening instead of jumping into their lives and making yourself seen like the antagonist to their protagonist being the better option of the two.
So whilst I love and understand Homura and hope she manages to do whatever it is she wants to do you also kind of want to shake her and see exactly why she thinks this…. THIS! Is the best option for her.
I would say we’ll never know but I’m sure we will.