My Week as a Playlist Week 31

So another week has gone and we’re still on our streak. I pretty much did a proper blog last week after a cop out the week before. This time… I dunno, I’ve managed to pick seven, count them SEVEN, songs I THINK I can do something with so lets see what we get.

Things Change – Less than Jake

The hand you’re dealt
Does it mean it’s all over
On cruise control as life just drags us along
How does it feel
Now that the party’s over
Is it too late for us to want something more

So I think a lot of my problems recently has been all about me not being able to see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Some of it is due to my depression but a lot of it is probably just human nature anyway.

I’m 29, I’m not really young anymore and I’ve never really lived much of my life up until recently and even then I’ve kind of stopped doing things again. Sometimes you just sit there and have to think “is that it?” like what else am I meant to do?

The future’s here and we want something more

Like most people I thought I’d have a “normal” life when I got older but I am now older and things aren’t too much different to back then. Of course people will say that is just life but for me I just haven’t done much. Of course I have and I’m a totally different person from 10 years ago, we did a blog on it so we know this, but what I have now that I didn’t have back then is basically a better paid job that I do nothing with the money I earn. I’ve not found someone I’d want to try and spend the rest of my life with, I haven’t even decided if I want kids or not, I haven’t moved out or even really made any headway into having a social life.

This is my “when I’m older” moment and… Yeah… I probably do want more. Because I didn’t actually do fuck all with the middle bit anyway.

Drag me Down – Eat Your Heart Out

I don’t wanna change my face in any way
I won’t fit your frame
I’ve seen enough to know your games
Cast yourself in the brightest sunlight
Drag me down until you feel alright

Again this is just a “life in general” thing but I just liked the lyrics.

I mean sometimes I get down about the way I look and the fact that I am the way I am. Again its human nature. If I was just prettier or even just slightly less manly looking then the man of my dreams would fall in love with me, just I’m not so I’m gonna struggle to even want to look in a mirror let alone find someone who wants to wake up next to this mug every day.

Then again… I’m happy.

Some people spend all their time trying to fit in and they aren’t happy. Some people find that kind of thing effortless. The people who will truly one day care about me will take me for who I am. A weird, geeky, gender neutral idiot who only owns one pair of trousers, right now has two pairs of shoes both with holes in them and that doesn’t really like heat or sunlight much.

Conquer – All the luck in the world

All you have to do in life is die
Everything else is a choice

So this might seem like a super depressing song with lyrics like that and this…

Trees throw their leaves to the ground
And some people leave without sound

I kind of like it thought and felt more positive listening to it. It isn’t even the music but the lyrics themselves.

Again this week was one I reflected on myself a lot. Nothing really happened but mentally I’ve come up from my low and I’ve been looking at a lot of things and the song is right. We literally have one thing that is certain to us and that is after we’re born at some point we will die. You can say that humans have to do this or that but we don’t.

You can choose pretty much everything in life. Even if there is a “need” inside you for something you want but can’t have its still a choice. No human was born to date another human or get this certain job, we might have been born in two unique sexes so that we can continue the species but its our choices as humans whether we actually have kids or not. Things we think humans HAVE to do are just programmed into us from a young age because that is what society has deemed we have to do and believe is normal. In actuality we pick what road we go down, and whilst we might not be able to pick the perfect path all the time for many reasons and sometimes those paths get picked for us, its still not something that we were really born to do.

I found it a pretty positive message because if you could bend your mind to believe that you’d be a more positive person. You might not have things go your own way but you’d look at life in a more positive fashion.

Just thought it was a interesting little song.


And I know I will never understand
But I wish you’d come back and ask for my hand
‘Cause I’d cut both them off to see your face

Like I have to get one mention in of “that” so there it is.

World of Joy – To Kill A King

This week has been a pretty positive one so I thought I’d share this song. Its basically a list of things that you should aim at.

Be passionate yeah (yes!)
Be positive yeah (yes!)
Be a cog of change in these twisted times
And don’t let the weight of it, 
Suffocate you or discourage yo

Where I fail in life is being positive. I can be very passionate about things and some people don’t like that but I can’t help it, its a good thing and I think my passion for some things, mainly wrestling, does tend to be positive as it leads other people into being curious and wanting to see it. Its also very important to try and keep your head up when fighting battles because even the smallest of victories is a victory and should help you keep moving forward.

Be slow to anger yeah (yes!)
Be quick to smile yeah (yes!)
Be tolerant because these times are delicate
And don’t stop listening
Don’t stop talking
Because without this we could move backwards

This is like a message I always love to hear being told.


The whole thing about “be nice to people because you don’t know what is going on in their life” is so true. A smile can make someone who is having a bad day feel so much better, we as humans should just be more tolerant and if we start listening and talking to each other more we’d become more understanding and people would feel safer in a world that is actually really difficult to live in for a lot of people.

I hope one day I find “my truth” until then I do hope I can be a better person and help others. I might not do it all the time but it is something I work towards.



And that ladies and gentlemen is the weekly playlist.

I think the moral of this week is be positive, try and love yourself and others whilst also giving yourself a much deserved break.

You are you.

Everything around us isn’t what being you is meant to be, human society is made up by humans on the spot all the time. You might not be able to get your dream job, house or partner but you can still be you and there is never a time that you should give up on you.

Or something like that.

Which coming from someone who last week was suicidal is a positive step.

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