Week 10 Question : Are you the same person you were 10 years ago?

Maybe I’m at the wrong age to do this one but I guess its a interesting way to look at life.

10 years ago I was 18, I was at college studying Classical Civilizations and English Literature. Now I’m working in supermarket as a Customer Assistant doing… Not much else with my life.

10 Years ago I had just fought a year of being a recluse, never leaving the house, it was hard to get to college which was sometimes a two bus journey away. I didn’t really have the mental energy to then try and make friends so spent the entire year kinda miserable and on my own. Now I don’t really have any close friends other then my internet friends but I’m pretty relaxed talking to people at work. In general I’m a lot more chill talking to people but I still have a lot of anxiety about it.

Within those 10 years I spent most of my life working for a charity store. My time there was pretty awful to be honest, the upper management was full of bullies, the work was ridiculous, targets and stress to make targets even on volunteers was terrible. Working with a lot of different people though gave me a chance to see the world in different lights, you get to see people at their worst, people who come from different places, people who grew up similar to you but ended up in a different financial and mental place… It gave me a lot of confidence not only because you had to work with a revolving door of people but because the management treated even the lowest of the low in the store to do the managers job for them.

So I guess I very much have changed in the last 10 years.

I mean I’m pretty different from where I was 2 years ago when I was still working for that store. I changed quite rapidly within the first 6 months at the supermarket I work for. Whilst I was kinda confident after years of having to do other people’s jobs I became more confident beingΒ  a job where I was actually appreciated and treated well for doing my own job well instead of being treated like crap for doing a good job of someone else’s job. I work with a group of people that are in general just much nicer, not that I didn’t work with nice people but there was only a core working staff of like 5 or 6 people and only 2 of those paid staff were nice.

Financially I’m still not that well off. I’m terrible with money but when before I just didn’t have money now I seem to burn through money stupidly fast. I don’t even know what the hell I spend it on but it goes before I know it. So I’m still living at home, still haven’t learnt how to drive and only JUST getting my provisional.

I actually still have the same friends pretty much. Fiona being the main one, Leigha… They are pretty much the only people who have constantly been in my life, as well as Pete who unfortunately died last year.

So yeah I don’t think I’m the same person.

I’m more confident, my knowledgeable, still bad with money but in completely new ways, still watch the same terrible movies but have a whole bunch of other movies I watch now too which are equally as terrible. I dunno I think you change as a person all the time and even the smallest thing in your life will change you a whole bunch.

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