5* Wrestling : Episode 2 Newcastle

Yes I’m well aware I forgot to write a opener for the review, yes I’m aware that I’m a idiot. Week 2 of 5* wrestling reviewed below because its 1:40am and I can’t think of anything witty to say.

SCREWFACE vs HT DRAKE
Winner : HT Drake

 

Drake is a great wrestler, I have been watching Drake for the last year and he’s bloody fantastic. This match wasn’t a good Drake match though. Screwface wasn’t bad but he wasn’t really that great, there were a few mistakes and from the name I guessed what kind of character Screwface was but he was very stompy and boring. It felt like a chore for him to get from one big move to the other with nothing to connect them and the story that Drake was trying to overcome a physical monster would have worked better if Drake wasn’t pretty much the same size as Screwface.

Lets face it, we were watching a match with a wrestler named Screwface.

Thankfully Drake did win but it was not a good show of the extreme talent of Drake. This guy is a super star though.

JACK JESTER vs TIMM WYLIE
Winner : Jack Jester

Timm Wylie, that is the name of the person from the first match last week. I don’t know why they have Jester on the pre-show again but here he is.

It was a slightly better match for Jester then last week where he basically just walked over Primate, Wylie isn’t too bad but Jester is the star right there and it wasn’t long before he went 2-0 up on 5*. It wasn’t a really interesting match so doesn’t surprise me it was on the pre-show.

MAX MONEY vs EL LIGERO & JODY FLEISCH
5* TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Winners : Max Money

It was such a good match. Or maybe just starting with El Ligero and Fleisch showing off against the naughty boys who tried to bully their way through them. It was a lot of fun and got the crowd on side, it had the humour that I know three of the four of them can bring to any match but it was also extremely fast and hard hitting.

Love the team of Max Money, Maxted and Sterling work so well together and even though it sounds like they are a new team they actually are very synchronized as a team already. Adam Maxted gets better every single second he spends in the ring and really is someone to watch because he could be right at the top of the 5* mountain, on his own, very soon.

One thing I loved was the assisted hurricanrana. Its honestly one of the best moves I’ve ever seen but not long after that it was all over with a interesting enough double team move from Max Money and they are the first ever 5* Tag Champions. Great result.

ZACK GIBSON / JAKE HAGER

How is this guy actually not in the main event tonight? How is he not just the number one person in this company? I love his war against 5* giving everything to the Americans. It really is my favourite thing about 5* in its first two weeks. This guy is honestly just so brilliant. I really thought the bit about him having to talk about a headline and it never was put up on the screens. Gibson’s anger is just great.

Hager was meh. It took a while for the crowd to realise the angry guy in the ring was actually probably the good guy. Was surprised that Gibson didn’t interrupt Hager going on about the wrestlers not being any good in the UK, obviously pointing to the fact that he beat Eddie last week, when he actually cheated to win. It sounded like the perfect time for Gibson to make a point and get in Hager’s face but I don’t know if its because they can only have one mic working at a time or if they just didn’t want Gibson to actually have a argument with Hager and just kill two promo spots in one. Either way two good promos, shame that they didn’t actually interact but I’m also biased because I like both guys.

ZACK GIBSON vs RVD
Winner : RVD (DQ)

It was a pretty cool match to watch, makes you kinda wish that you could see Gibson vs RVD at RVD’s prime because he’s amazingly good but he’s much slower then he once was. Gibson also tried to spend his time grounding RVD but when he lost control of the match he lost it in epic style.

My favourite part of the match was when it went outside the ring. I mean it wasn’t that brilliant for obvious reasons, it doesn’t look well padded and the padding there looks dodgy so I get why they took the monkey flip and rolling thunder slowly but it was still fun and such a RVD thing to do.

Another DQ for Gibson after he stuck RVD in his submission whilst RVD was holding the rope then shoving the ref, but for some reason I just think that is a really good thing for Gibson. He’s coming across as the really overly violent guy you don’t want to cross. I really like what Gibson is doing. He really is the highlight of 5*.

FLASH MORGAN WEBSTERS MODCAST

I am going to give so much props to 5* for doing this because I said last week that they just chucked a load of matches together and didn’t bother to build any stories or characters. This week they had the two good promos from Gibson and Hager and then we have the Modcast. I’ve only actually heard one podcast from Webster and it was pretty cool to be honest, they had decked the ring out in Union Jacks which you know is just perfect for him.

His guest was Primate. THAT feels weird for me because obviously as I said I’ve only seen him in DEFIANT where his character is just a Primate so its funny seeing him in normal clothes and talking like a normal person. I guess I get that he was there because he is from Newcastle, does this mean that Eddie Ryan will be on the Modcast in Plymouth? Not that I’m going. Anyway its weird in a way to have him on the main show doing the Modcast when he was basically squashed in a pre-show match against Jack Jester last week and Jester is still on the pre-show doing nothing much and here he is on the main show on the Modcast as well as apparently wrestling later on.

When Joey Axl came out pointing out how well he did in the Snap or Tap match I was really happy because it meant they weren’t just going to have a silly interview thing in the middle of the ring they were going to do something fun. Axl ended up getting in Primate’s face, throwing Webster out of the ring before putting Primate in his cool submission move. That technically makes it four people in 5* that has tapped to it.

Amazing segment.

FLASH MORGAN WEBSTER vs JOEY AXL
Winner : Joey Axl

So the Modcast was able to set up this match which was very different from what both did in their Snap or Tap match last week. It was able to go at Websters pace which meant we got a little more flash from him. Axl is interesting to watch though, how he took over from Morgan looked like something Bobcat’s character off of Police Academy would do, he really looked like that kind of character from back in the 80s. He slowed the pace of the match but it was the perfect thing to do because Webster works so well as a underdog who has to fight out of corners.

Websters headbutt followed by the Swanton onto the back of Axl was really cool. His dive to the outside minutes later wasn’t that good though plus the fact that Axl then rolled to the complete opposite side of the ring before Webster even got in just once again slowed the match down maybe to a pace that was TOO slow.

Axl got the win with the Ayers Rock Lock, I thought that was what they were calling it but it wasn’t until Hendry said it that I realised it was what it was.

EDDIE RYAN vs PJ BLACK
Winner : Eddie Ryan

So happy with the opening section of the match which showed that Ryan was able to match Black in speed and agility as well as strength.

It was a interesting match up though. Eddie Ryan being a gentleman and letting Black in the ring, when the tables were turned and Black was being a gentleman he went for a handshake and attacking Ryan during it. Ryan just fought whilst Black was a little disrespectful, it was a interesting tale being told, not that the main commentator would have you think seeing he was more interested in making sure we all know that PJ Black is cool and goes sky diving and is a nice person even though this match didn’t make him sound that way.

A George Cross wins the match for Ryan. A great win for the English Lion. My hometown hero.

MOOSE vs RAMPAGE
Winner : NO CONTEST

So Rampage this time attacks Moose before Moose is even in the ring, before he’s even announced. I don’t really know why they are going for this story as Rampage is a badass enough that he doesn’t need that kind of help to beat Moose.

It really wasn’t a match either. In the end Rampage just beat the shit out of Moose until the ref called the match off. I have to say that I just didn’t get it so I did kind of zone out a little bit but yeah… That is what happened.

BIG GRIZZLY & DAVE MASTIFF vs THE MASTERS OF COOL
Winners : The Masters of Cool

“I believe whoever wins this could be in line for a championship match against Max Money” is that because these are the only four tag teams 5* have? Because I have a feeling its because we haven’t seen a single other tag team so far. With The Masters of Cool being the two “big name” stars I can’t see them going anywhere because they need to be on the shows but there are plenty of great tag teams out there.

It was a good match, I love Grizzly and Mastiff they are great together. I don’t find The Masters of Cool interesting to watch though and you did kind of just sit there waiting for them to spit the apple in everyone’s face.

I don’t want to see The Masters of Cool vs Max Money again though. I just really don’t want to see that.

REY MYSTERIO vs MARK HASKINS
Winner : Rey Mysterio (DQ)

It was a Tap or Snap championship but then suddenly it wasn’t. I will, just so you know, forever get the name of this championship the wrong way around so yeah.

Man this was a good match and Haskins was awesome in it. We all know that Mysterio still has it and it was great seeing Haskins actually beat Mysterio at Mysterio’s own game with his speed. He was able to change tactics at a million miles a hour and took the fight to Mysterio.

Breathtaking stuff, it just didn’t stop. Both Mysterio and Haskins just ran rings around each other and the reversals were amazing. The match unfortunately was thrown out when Rampage came out to take out Mysterio and piledrive him. It lost a match for Haskins even though he didn’t do anything before he went off on his way.

Shame the match ended the way it did because it was a spectacular match.

MAX MONEY / UK HOOLIGANS

I want to see Max Money vs The Masters of Cool. Please just don’t… Why do I have to deal with the UK Hooligans. The annoying dude on commentary got way too over excited about it. Man am I not looking forward to that.

NATHAN CRUZ 

Oh poor Nathan Cruz, Mr Professional getting his words all mixed up right off the bat. He isn’t very happy about the Who Are You? Chants which I can get, its a stupid chant. I do like his use of backside though and he does have a pretty backside. It isn’t until I sit here watching Cruz chat that I realise he looks like David Morrissey. Also his Scottish impression is the best thing in the world, I want him on every wrestling show I ever watch. He pushed Liam Slater down to my third favourite person in the world. I love him.

NATHAN CRUZ vs BT GUNN
Winner : BT Gunn

As the match was all about Cruz being pissed off with Gunn it wasn’t surprised that it was actually a very hard hitting match. Cruz doesn’t want to be seen as a joke and he didn’t look like one in this match, Gunn is one of those people who looks like he’s going to murder you in the middle of the ring with the big kicks and slams and Cruz did his best to keep Gunn at bay but Gunn is also extremely good at getting himself out of a bad situation.

Really good match.

Loved that it ended with Gunn trying to pull his pants down again and with Cruz doing everything to keep his pants up Gunn got the win with a roll up. Sad for Cruz and I hope he is a big thing for 5* going forward because I love him so much.

JAKE HAGER vs JOHN MORRISON
5* CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Winner : Jake Hager

The match was a little boring for me. I mean I like the two guys in it but it just wasn’t interesting. Hager is in a storyline right now and you want to hate him but he also was the ass hole that cheated last week so the whole “unstoppable force” he was trying to play wasn’t really working.

Gibson did try and get involved in the match but failed miserably.

Hager won the match in the end with his ankle lock, hoping it means Eddie gets a title shot in Plymouth against Hager after all its clear to everyone that Hager cheated to beat him and it would be nice if we got that match in Eddie’s home town. Makes me sad that I’m not going really.

FINAL THOUGHTS…

Most of the things I didn’t like about last week have been improved. The ring ropes were much better, the music had been introduced for the British wrestlers, the lights had been put on so that we could see the crowd, not that there was much of a crowd, and overall it was just a better atmosphere.

My biggest problem now is the commentators. Joe Hendry is bloody amazing, he’s oozing charisma and obviously knows what he’s talking about seeing he’s on the best wrestlers in the UK at the moment. The other guy though is just bad. He was more like a football commentator and spent too much time telling us things that were just boring and pointless. He told us the whole life story of PJ Black, ignoring the stuff in ring, and made PJ Blacks backstory really boring. In that match he also talked over the handshake and after the fact then started boringly telling us what he’d just talked over. The amount of times he said skydiving through that match was so annoying too.

Just change him or someone just make him listen to himself and how boring he is.

As I was writing about their match I LOVE that Bram was in the background of that match watching on, he was in the background behind the commentators last week and I think its going to be a great moment when Bram actually gets to wrestle on the show.

All over just a better show. Better atmosphere, better paced, some great segments both in ring and backstage and just a easier episode to watch. Like a giant leap from last week. I do have to say that I skipped through any section with the commentators speaking after/before matches which helped because it cut a great deal of the 3 hours down but it didn’t feel like a chore to watch and I was still as excited when the main event rolled around as I was when the show began.

Actually can’t wait for next week now.

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