Week 12

23rd March – 29th March

Week 2 Question :
How have you changed in the last two years?

Well its funny. I’ve become more confident without really showing it, I’ve become more open without really knowing it and I’ve become happier without ever feeling it.

Strange I know but its true.

Two years ago I’d jump at my own shadow (OK I still do that quite often,) I couldn’t make eye contact with anyone and I kept everything bottled inside me till I exploded (strangely enough I DID explode two years ago which is probably why I changed.)

I’m getting to the point where I don’t care what I think everyone else thinks about me (yeah stupid) because I’m kind of happy with myself the way I am. I still have a ways to go but I’ve got to the conclusion that to be honest if I just smile and be myself I’m going to turn out fine regardless of whether I think at that time I’m going to be fine. Everything will turn out alright I just need to keep doing the things that make me happy. Of course that is always hard but I’m trying.

I’m trying. *Shakes fists* I’m trying….

MONDAY 23rd March

Woke up : 9:30am

It wasn’t actually a bad time to wake up seeing that I did go to bed at a stupid hour once more. Not bad. If I actually went to bed at a reasonable hour I might actually get up early.

I guess why I woke up that time was because Amanda texted me screaming about a massive spike in viewers on here. After initially not understanding what she was going on about I kind of figured out she was worried that someone on Facebook she knew had posted a link, yet she doesn’t know anyone on Facebook and isn’t on Facebook herself. I soon remembered I gave a friend the link to our site on Facebook and he probably was the guy that clicked from there (calm your shit Manda calm it!) and she was a lot happier.

Amanda is a strange one!

Me? Well I’m strange too but on this day I was level headed and actually too busy worrying about other things I don’t want to talk about here. Yes there is something I won’t share on a blog, or at least some things I won’t share yet maybe at a later date.

My paranoia was playing up (I actually suffer from Paranoid Anxiety mainly) and I was sure my next door neighbour was spying on me (long story but to be honest that isn’t so much paranoia as knowing how bad they are!) I spent most of the day on Minecraft before switching to a random game chosen by my friend (well after I got bored of playing Broken Sword) which is called Banished and I’ll have a blog about that at some point. I got addicted to it and played it all night even whilst watching House of Fools and Newsnight!

TUESDAY 24th March

Woke up : 9am

Horrah! Waking up before 10am every day. Didn’t think it’ll happen but things are starting to look a lot more positive for me. I’ve found that something happened recently that makes me smile a lot and because I wake up smiling and not feeling like I’m about to cry I can just get out of bed.

So there we go people one way to get someone out of bed in the morning is to make them smile.

I don’t really know how to explain why I’m happy because I’ve just suddenly BECOME happy, I’m probably going to have to blame it on work or something because if I’m honest I don’t know why I’m so happy but whatever it is that is making me happy or whomever it is thank you so much.

Something else that made me happy today? Life is Strange Episode 2 came out. Man was it brilliant, I wasted half the day on Banished (really a great game) before playing it. I really love the game and at some point will need to work on it properly see how many different stories I can get going.

The only other thing of note for today was that I felt thinner. I haven’t dared to weigh myself because I have a feeling I’ll be bigger like last time but I’ve found another two t-shirts that used to be really tight and now aren’t. Last week or the week before it was my Kevin Nash t-shirt this week its my Motorcity Machine Guns T-shirt I brought when I went to see TNA and my Silent Singer t-shirt (I’ve lost my Mr Jelly/Jolly t-shirt booo!)

I’m feeling slightly better about myself but at the same time I know I’m probably actually gaining weight. I really need to start doing something about that because I don’t mind keeping the same weight but I don’t want to put any back on or go over where I started!

But still I have a stupid grin on my face and we’ll see how long that lasts! I feel like it’ll disappear soon.

WEDNESDAY 25th March

Woke up : 9:40am

I didn’t really get much done, the day was a bit of a lazy day. There was so much that I wanted to do but in the end I was just playing video games and watching TV.

It was fun to sit around and do not much all. Also it was fun to spend some time talking to Pete who hasn’t really been online for a while now so it was cool to be able to catch up with him and spend some time just chilling online with him.

Wednesday was my lazy day…

THURSDAY 26th March

Woke up : 10am

There was a scramble to get things done for the month ahead, also a scramble for me to keep on top of some of my reviews and stuff. If you don’t know I’m actually a few weeks ahead with my gaming reviews such as Gaming Babble and the Thursday reviews. This basically means that I can take my time with things but also there are some games that’ll be in Gaming Babble I’m currently playing at the same time as Birth by Sleep and it’ll give me freedom and make sure these blogs come out weekly.

My whole thing for today though was to go out somewhere, anywhere and at least spend a hour or two outside (which is something I don’t tend to do very often) which I did do. I went to the Forder Valley Nature Reserve at the end of my street and walked along the top path. It wasn’t a long walk by any means and I didn’t leave the top path because the top path was muddy enough. I took some random photos in there before coming home.

I didn’t do half as much as I wanted and to be fair I’m way behind where I was planning on being but we got a few things done.

We’ve also been talking to Pete about what he wants to do on here. Pete was always going to be joining us when he came back online properly but he wants to find his place amongst us himself. It was nice having everyone together again as its been a long time since all of us have been online at the same time.

A very nice day which ended with Inside No.9 which was amazing.

FRIDAY 27th March

Woke up : 7am

Another day and another “I wish I hadn’t bothered” day.

I moan a lot about work like most people but in general I love the job I have but it has been so quiet in recent weeks that I just can’t be motivated.

Everyone is starting to feel like their motivation to be there is dying out but it just means that all the work we used to never find time to do is being left because no one can be bothered any more or at least it gets left until we get in trouble and then its up to the part timers to do it.

It sucks as well because we haven’t got that many volunteers any more so it isn’t even like when it gets quiet you can have a group discussion about things or find something to do in a pair that’ll keep you busy whilst talking for a hour or so. Its so depressing just standing staring out at cars going past the shop. We are totally at the wrong end of town so it isn’t even like we get the luxury of  seeing people very often pass the shop!

When the day is as dull as today was it means when you get home there is little to nothing for you to feel happy about doing. I took Gimli out for a few walks and sat around playing Game of Thrones. It really was just quite a depressingly slow day.

SATURDAY 28th March

Woke up : 7am

Usually Saturday is the busiest day of the week even when it is slow but the same can’t be said for today.

We went two hours at a time without seeing a single customer.

I spent a lot of the day sat around wishing the phone would ring so I could book in collections.

By the end of the day I’d given up on life.

And then because my manager and my warehouse manager both drive so getting out of work on time isn’t that important to them I missed my bus and ended up standing about for thirty minutes waiting for the next one. Thanks guys! When my manager needed to get a bus every day she took seconds to do the banking and stuff at the end of the day but now she’s got a car its like she’s forgotten how annoying public transport is! Soon though its going to be important for me to be away on time as my bus stop is moving to the top of town instead of the middle of town which means a extra few minutes walking. I barely make the bus as it is now I’m going to have to rush to get up to my bus stop. With Gimli being home every weekend and my sister not being happy with me and my mum so not wanting to spend time with us it isn’t even like I’d be meeting people in town after work to pass the time between buses.

Frustrating days.

SUNDAY 29th March

Woke up : 9am

It was raining all day, there wasn’t much that we could do but sit around hoping the rain would go away. We spent the whole day playing Game of Thrones, Walking Dead and Life is Strange before giving up and going to bed.

We had to take Gimli out for a few walks and got soaked each and every bloody time. It was cold and miserable. I felt miserable all day. I had no motivation to do jack shit and spent most of it moping about the place thinking about having to work next Saturday and listen to a annoying 17 year old Vettel fan going on about his race win. Not that I mind that Vettel won but the fact that he goes over board with it and seems to think if Alonso isn’t winning I’ll be in a corner crying my eyes out when I’ve been a F1 fan long enough (and usually support drivers with little to no chance of winning) that just having Alonso DRIVE was good enough for me.

I was going to get a early night but suddenly Amanda and Pete wanted to watch TNA with me and then me and Amanda were having a long discussion about McLaren whilst Pete moaned and dripped about the fact that Amanda finds Eric Young creepy. It was 2am when Amanda went to bed and about 4am when I finally went to bed.

Exciting as the week gets I’m afraid.

News of the week :
The Germanwings crash was the big news all week. It was such a tragic thing to happen and shocked everyone.

TV Show of the week :
Inside No.9 by miles. Bates Motel was good as well and The Walking Dead was interesting but if you haven’t seen any of Inside No.9 you should. I was always going to be a fan because I love Shearsmith and Pemberton but this series shows such a strength in their writing that its hard to believe the whole world isn’t madly in love with it.

Anime of the week :
Death Parade’s final episode was a heart breaker. I’m not sure I’m 100% happy with it but there was a lot to like about it. Sad that its over but hoping that there could one day be a second series! I love the judgements and think that the “war” between ideologies isn’t over with Nona and Occulus!

Song of the week :
A Place for my head – Linkin’ Park. This week I just felt like shouting. Mainly positively and I don’t know why this is the greatest song to sing along to even when you’re happy but it seems to be a great song to sing along to when you want to shout for no reason. Happy Anna’s shout a lot. Angry Anna’s cry a lot. There was a lot of Weezer and Blur as well this week.

Random Thought of the week :
I don’t get why people on Tumblr need to use tragedies to further their “life is unfair” mantra.

The tragic events of the Germanwings disaster lead to loads of people blindly going on and on about how if the co-pilot had been black he’d have been a terrorist, ignoring the definition of what terrorism is and the amount of people on Tumblr telling them to keep their garbage to themselves.

It isn’t the first time and won’t be the last time, whenever something like this happens Tumblr tends to find a reason to push their personal agenda’s and they then never listen ever to anyone who gives them the vital examples they are always asking for.

The thing that made me laugh was that no one seemed to have ever heard of Anders Breivic who is a white terrorist from a few years back. It was like because they’d never heard of him (HOW?!) suddenly he didn’t count (HOW?!)

This is why Tumblr gets a bad name. Its the same with some quarters of Tumblr’s feminism that is too busy telling the world how women are above men and all men should be lumped together and saying otherwise is being blind/ignorant etc.

It just confuses me how people can be that way!

Not ONE person was naming the victims in this group of Social Justice Warriors, not ONE person was talking about the pilot who was trying to break that door down to save the plane. Not ANY of them were talking about the actual accident. It was just something to complain about.

 

Another week over. Its been a decent week, next week I’m working a lot at the end of the week (Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday) and it carries on into the next week (Monday ((yes both bank holiday days!)) ,Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday) so right at this moment you’ll find that I might not be doing as much as I usually do on the page! Or at least this blog will suddenly become MONDAY – Bored TUESDAY – Pissed off…. I’ll try to be a little more interesting then that!

I’m kind of thinking about starting to walk home sometimes but we’ll see whether that goes ahead or not.

As always I’d love to hear about your week too so drop me a line!

Have a nice week.

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